As I was reading My Utmost For His Highest this morning, I was struck by Oswald Chamber's title for the devotion: "Leave Room For God". His guiding verse was Galatians 1:15 which says,
"By when it pleased God...."
Chambers' point in the devotional was that we often look for God to come in a certain way, a particular way, a way that often holds no element of surprise. Yet God always shows up on His own time schedule and in His own way. Because of that we should live in a state of expectancy, ready for Him at any time. That was the very, surprising moment when the Spirit broke free from the page I was reading and spoke directly to me. Though He used the devotional to get me to listen, what He said had less to do with the devotional and everything to do with my own sinful heart. It was a completely unexpected visit from Him...
He began to speak to me about the truth that I do not personally practice living in a state of expectancy when it comes to Him just showing up. He spoke to my heart about me elbowing Him out of my day as I push through on my own. And when He had my full attention, He revealed my real problem to me. Look at the image on this blog. It captures the essence of what the Spirit told me.
You see, my problem is not that I haven't made room for God in my life. Oh, I surely have. I came to Jesus in need of a Savior when I was a young teenager, and the moment I prayed a prayer about that very need, the Holy Spirit came to live in my heart. It is the home of the Holy Spirit now. But my spiritual heart has many chambers, and the Spirit does not have full control and access to every dark corner, every back passageway, every single room. Sadly, I have only made room for Him to the degree that I desire for Him to become the Sole Master of my life.
In many ways He has control of my spiritual journey, but in other areas I have crammed Him tightly into a dark closet in the attic. I keep Him there because I want to do things my way; I want to explode in anger when I feel like it; I want to be negative instead of finding the positive points; I want to be listened to more than I want to listen; I want to continue to claim my rights when I have none; I want to be lord and master and retain some control of my life. In those areas of my life I have certainly made room for Jesus, I just don't let Him into the whole house. I keep Him tucked away in an obscure closet where He can have no impact on my life.
I see the error of my actions, and I know what the Word tells me about my condition, but too often I do nothing about it. Truthfully, other than surrendering to the work of the Spirit in me, there is nothing I can do about it. My strength and self-will can never be able to bring about the heart change that I need. It is not me who needs to take control of my heart; it is the Spirit of Christ who must. But first, I must give over control and authority by surrender to the God of my heart. And as I do, I know that transformation will occur. I can expect it!
PRAYER
Holy Spirit of Jesus the Son, You came into me for one reason. You came to live the life of Christ out of me. You came to have full reign of my entire heart. But I have kept You locked away in the attic on so many occasions. Those times You were robbed of the chance for righteous, peace, and joy to come forth. And I have reaped what I sowed myself because I was in control of me. Too many times You have begged to be set free from Your closet in my heart, times when You wanted me to do the right thing, and I didn't; times You wanted me to let You control my emotions and unkind words, but I chose to react in an ugly manner; times when You wanted me to keep my opinions to myself, but I let them fly out of me all the same. These are just a few of the times You have been peering out at me from Your jail cell in my heart. Forgive me, Holy Spirit. Oh how I want to get this right! Come out your cell to me as I come to You. I want You to have more and more control of my life as I make more, much more, room for You. May it please You, God, to come to my rescue, right now. I am expecting it, as I open the door for You to come forth! Come out and transform and convert me as You please.
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